Speechless

My grandma just passed away. She travelled to China a week ago after my grandfather passed in November. She needed to be there in person for matters concerning his will and while she was there she had heart problems and died in hospital.

I don't know how I feel right now. Part of me wanted to cry when I heard the news at work today, there were a few people in the room. That was the same reaction when I found out about my grandfather - I felt pain in my throat when I told Vaishali, who stood across from me in the kitchen.

But for some reason, I don't really feel sad because I cried when she had a stroke five years ago and since then... I already missed her. I used to dream every night that she would be able to walk and talk again.

A part of me is happy that she passed away in her homeland and not far away here in New Zealand where no one can visit her except my parents, my brother and me. At least she is back where she feels the most comfortable, home, where she spent all her youthful years. And she's back with my grandfather too. So I won't cry, I will be strong for them and for my family.

I will be going back to Hamilton early (Monday) to be with my mum and brother. My mum is finding it hard to work in the shop alone. My dad is still in China and will probably stay longer to organise my grandma's funeral.

When he called my mum to tell her, he was speechless.